By Guest Writer, Andie Graff, So Lucky To B Me Tees!

Did you know that the achievements we reach in our lives are affected by how we see ourselves?  Two small words…self-esteem, but one huge quality. Self-esteem is beliefs or feelings that we have about ourselves, or our “self perceptions.”  How we define ourselves influences the choices we make everyday from how we dress to who are friends are. Our self-esteem continues to change as we grow.  I feel as women it grows increasingly more difficult everyday to feel good about “who” we are and it’s because of society’s idea of the “perfect” woman. We all tend to believe that we are not good enough.

Regardless of what size you wear, your skin color, your past, the color of your hair, what you “own”, the car you drive, the accomplishments that you have or have not made, these are “things” about you, not who you are. They do not define you, you are the one and only you, and I believe that is good enough and quite frankly it’s more than enough.  Because you are a unique piece to the puzzle that makes up this world and it would not be complete without you.  You are worthy of being loved for being you.

I want to encourage you to feel lucky about the person you are, because luck isn’t just about four leaf clovers, rabbit’s feet and horseshoes. It’s about the gift of you, who you are, a confident and emotionally healthy individual. Striving everyday to be someone that is filled with compassion, caring and understanding. You bring qualities to this world that no one else can. Look at the world today so much is about improving, fixing, or changing what we have. Whether it’s as simple as your cell phone or as complex as you. Adjustments to the outside are just that, they are about exterior show.

What’s going on in the inside is where the integrity lies. We are all lucky and we matter not because we have the newest gadget. We are overwhelmed with material things starting as children. The greatest gift you can ever give to your child is a strong sense of individuality and pride in WHO they are. That will come from seeing you accepting and being happy with yourself. Positive messages reinforce positive thoughts and actions. Saying “I am So Lucky To B ME” is simply saying, “I love myself and I believe in myself”.  Embracing who you are, accepting your differences and believing in your self are what being lucky is all about.

I’m Andie Graff the creator of the inspirational t-shirt line called So Lucky To B Me. This line began as a way for me to empower myself and find my independence after my marriage of 18 yrs. ended.  Fortunately because of my strong self-esteem I knew that the material things I was losing did not define who I was. It quickly became my passion to encourage and inspire every woman to realize that your worth should be based solely on the person that you are, not the things you “own”  or who society thinks you should be ,that you are a person of value just by being the best YOU.

Always remember;  “Your castle can burn down, your riches may dwindle, your looks will fade, but WHO you are shall remain.”   I hope you will visit us @ www.soluckytobme.com and tell the world “I am So Lucky To B ME…” and believe it.  Our tees make great gifts to tell someone they matter or as a gentle reminder to yourself.

Luck always,

Andie xo

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Self Esteem Quotes are a super way to give yourself a boost to your self esteem.  Whether it’s a soft reminder, or a big kick in the butt to make certain you realize the greatness that is YOU, this set of Self Esteem Quotes can help inspire you and get you on the right track! Enjoy these Self Esteem Quotes. For more on Self Esteem, Click Here:  Self Esteem.

“We all know that self-esteem comes from what you think of you, not what other people think of you.” ~Gloria Gaynor

“The clearer the rules and the limits enforced by parents, the higher the child’s self-esteem. The more freedom the child had, the lower his self-esteem.” ~The Optimistic Child: A Proven Program to Safeguard Children Against Depression and Build Lifelong Resilience by Martin E. P. Seligman

“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt

“We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light.” ~Mary Dunbar

“The strongest single factor in acquiring abundance is self-esteem: believing you can do it, believing you deserve it, believing you will get it.” ~Jerry Gillies

“The privilege of a lifetime is being who you are.” ~Joseph Campbell

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh

“The higher our self-esteem, the stronger the drive to express ourselves, reflecting the sense of richness within. The lower our self-esteem, the more urgent the need to “prove” ourselves or to forget ourselves by living mechanically and unconsciously.” ~A Woman’s Self-Esteem: Struggles and Triumphs in the Search for Identity by Nathaniel Branden

“Resentment is weak and lowers your self-esteem.” ~Barbara Sher

“Conscience: self-esteem with a halo.” ~Irving Layton

“Never dull your shine for somebody else.” ~Tyra Banks

“Everyone needs to be valued. Everyone has the potential to give something back.” ~Princess Diana

“I am not afraid of storms for I am learning how to sail my ship.” ~Louisa May Alcott

“Be yourself. There is something that you can do better than any other. Listen to the inward voice and bravely obey that.” ~Unknown

“Because your existence in time and space is unique, there are lives that only you can touch.” ~Harry Palmer

“Self-justification, therefore, is not only about protecting high self-esteem; it’s also about protecting low self-esteem if that is how a person sees himself.” ~Book Mistakes Were Made (But Not by Me): Why We Justify Foolish Beliefs, Bad Decisions, and Hurtful Acts by Caroll Tavris, Elliot Aronson

“Put all excuses aside and remember this: YOU are capable.” ~Zig Ziglar

“Learn to value yourself, which means: to fight for your happiness.” ~Ayn Rand

“When I hear somebody sigh, “Life is hard,” I am always tempted to ask, “Compared to what?” ~Sydney Harris

“The fact is that self-esteem and your circumstances are only indirectly related. There is another intervening factor that determines self-esteem 100 percent of the time: your thoughts.” ~Self-Esteem by Matthew McKay, Patrick Fanning

“Tell me how a person judges his or her self-esteem and I will tell you how that person operates at work, in love, in sex, in parenting, in every important aspect of existence – and how high he or she is likely to rise. The reputation you have with yourself – your self-esteem – is the single most important factor for a fulfilling life.” ~Nathaniel Branden

“The best way to achieve self-esteem is to do something worthy of esteem.” ~Rush: Why You Need and Love the Rat Race by Todd Buchholz

“Self-esteem is different than conceit. Conceit is the weirdest disease in the world. It makes everyone sick except the one who has it.” ~Hartman Rector, Jr.

“Don’t live down to expectations. Go out there and do something remarkable.” ~Wendy Wasserstein

“Self-esteem is as necessary to the spirit as food is to the body.” ~Dr. Maxwell Maltz

“At the root of fear is low self-esteem. This explains why angry people have low self-esteem, are argumentative, stubborn, and quick to flare up yet slow to forgive. Those behaviors are defenses against the underlying fear.” ~Setting Boundaries with Difficult People by David J. Lieberman Ph.D.

“You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with.” ~Dr. Wayne W. Dyer

“Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have.” ~Doris Mortman

“Do not wish to be anything but what you are, and try to be that perfectly.” ~St. Francis De Sales

“There is a direct relationship between self-discipline and self-esteem.” ~No Excuses!: The Power of Self-Discipline by Brian Tracy

“The things we hate about ourselves aren’t more real than things we like about ourselves.” ~Ellen Goodman

“Someone’s opinion of you does not have to become your reality.” ~Les Brown

“Most of the shadows of this life are caused by standing in one’s own sunshine.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson

“Practice within when you’re without.” ~Daniel Pena

“Self-confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings.” ~Samuel Johnson

“The way you treat yourself sets the standard for others.” ~Sonya Friedman

“Having a low opinion of yourself is not ‘modesty.’ It’s self-destruction. Holding your uniqueness in high regard is not ‘egotism.’ It’s a necessary precondition to happiness and success.” ~Bobbe Sommer

“Self Esteem begins here: anyone who does not like you is an idiot. Really -aren’t they? You are gorgeous, talented and fabulous.” ~Chellie Campbell

For more Positive Quotes, Click Here: Positivity Quotes from Positivity Toolbox.

For more on Self Esteem, Click Here:  Self Esteem.

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Smart Goal Setting is an acronym using the word “SMART” or “SMARTER” to set goals. It helps the goal-setter put together a plan so that they are more likely to achieve their goal.  Smart stands for Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant, and Timely.  Often people add an “E” and an “R” to the end making the acronym read as “Smarter.”  The E and the R stand for Evaluate and Reevaluate.

You know there have been times in your life where you have accomplished what you set out to do, but there have also been times where your goal has fallen by the wayside. The absolute truth is that you can accomplish anything you set your mind to.  The sky is your limit. Smart Goal Setting makes it more likely you reach for the sky and end up in the sky.

Here’s how Smart Goal Setting works:

S

The “S” in Smart goal setting stands for “Specific.”  It can also sometimes be referred to as “Simple” or “Significant.”

Studies show that the more specific a goal is the more likely you are to achieve it.  This is as opposed to a general goal.  Set your goal so that it is clear and discernible.  For example, a general goal would be setting a goal to have better relationships.  A specific goal would be to communicate better with your sister to avoid as many disagreements and better the relationship.   This sets forth expectations, as well as what you plan to do to make the goal happen. An easy way to make your goal more specific is to use the who, what, where, when and why.

M

The “M” in smart goal setting stands for “Measurable.” Some professionals also refer to it as “Motivational,” “Manageable,” or “Meaningful.”

This part of goal setting is about how you measure your success towards reaching the goal.  To do this means to lay out measurable steps to be sure you are on track to reaching your goal. Without a means of measuring your progress, especially with more complex goals, you cannot know how well you are doing with reaching the goal.  This also pushes the goal-setter to get more done in a timely manner and keeps the goal-setter on track!

A

The “A” in smart goal setting stands for “Attainable.” It is also often refered to in these other “A” terms:  “Achievable,” “Actionable,” “Assignable,” “Aspirational,” “Ambitious, “Agreed,” “Aligned,” and “Appropriate.”

This part of the goal setting process is making sure your goal is actually attainable.  It is okay if it is a difficult goal, but is it realistic and actually possible and not too far-reaching?  When a goal is believed to be attainable, the goal-setter is more likely to take action towards reaching the goal whereas if the goal-setter thinks it is impossible or if it actually is impossible, they will give up earlier. The attitude towards the goal is important!  So this part of goal-setting aswers a “how” question:  “How will I accomplish the goal?” Identify obstacles, but evaluate them to be sure they are not actually unworkable or impractical.

R

The “R” in smart goal setting stands for “Relevant.” Many people also refer to the “R” as  “Realistic.”

This part is where you check whether your goal is relevant to your life.  In other words, how important is it?  If it is unimportant or not worthwhile, the goal-setter will not work towards it.

T

The “T” in smart goal setting stands for “Timely.”  It can also represent a number of “Time”-oriented words, such as “Time frame.”

This is where you will match up your goals and/or steps to achieve the goal with a target date or dates. Deadlines are proven to help a person complete a task more timely.  This keeps the goal-setter on track and constantly working towards the end objective rather than just having an amorphous and indeterminate plan.  During this part, establish the answers to questions such as “When do I need to have XYZ completed to move on to the next task?”  “What do I need to do this week to complete step ABC?”

E and R

If you choose to ad the “E: and the “R,” then perhaps you are more serious about reaching your goal.  The “E” in smart goal setting stands for “Evaluate” and the “R” stands for “Reevaluate.”  These steps are used during the goal achievement process to examine how your plan is going and whether timelines or steps need to be reworked.

Write it Down

Last but not least, write it down! While this is not part of the Smart Goal Setting, written goals makes them more likely to be achieved. For more, read: Writing Goals.

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Generally speaking, people often feel they cannot say “no” to someone who asks them for something because they are worried about upsetting the other person and many of us are programed not to say “no” because we think if we do its not nice.  We have a tendency to dislike disagreeing, or we believe saying “yes” is easier than saying “no.” For some women especially, they simply cannot say “no.”  These women end up taking on too much and it affects their health and well being greatly. There are often times where it is best to say “no” to a request.  So we’re going to Learn to Say No because it is important to utter that small little word, and to do it guilt-free!

Adopt simple strategies to say “no,” politely but firmly. You do not need to cook stories up in order to refuse. So many times people lie in order to avoid saying “yes” to something they don’t want to do.  Do you do this?  You don’t need to offer lame excuses. You can say no without being dishonest.

Here are just a few of the gajillion and umpteen ways you can say “no”:

• “No.” (Easy!)
• “I can’t accept this, with my present commitments. I’m apologize and hope you find someone who has the time.”
• “I’m rather quite busy now. I have to decline.”
• “I don’t think I have the time for it, as I am in the middle of something important.”
• “I already have prior commitments.”
• “I want to say ‘yes’ because I feel like that is what you would like, but I have to say ‘no.’”
• “No, I would only be able to do a mediocre job right now if I took this on.”
• “No, I don’t have any spare time right now.”
• “No, I’m not interested in this and I know because of that I won’t do a good job for you.”
• Not this time, please give me more notice next time and I’ll work it into my schedule.
• “I can’t.”
• Why don’t you try someone else?  I’m not the right person for this.

There are a hundred other ways of saying “no” without feeling guilty, uneasy or hurting others by being blunt or rude.  Its not so much the way you say it as the feeling you allow yourself to have afterwards.  If you aren’t sure, you can always ask for time to make the decision without feeling guilty.  You may say you will have to think about it. If somebody persists with the request when you want to say “no,” you may have to be assertive and firm and that is totally okay.  With the exception of a boss and coworkers, which are trickier to say “no” to, surround yourself only with people who would only ask once and understand if you were to decline. You don’t need to risk over committing by saying “yes” when you actually want to say “no.”

On the subject of bosses and coworkers, it can be more delicate.  Often people who take on more than they can reasonably manage to do within a specified time, end up either not doing the job at all or doing it poorly or sacrifice time with family and loved ones in order to get the work done. When it comes to work, show your boss the reasons for not being able to accept the extra responsibility and suggest alternative strategies or others whose workload is lower or competence levels higher for accomplishing that particular piece of work. In any case, don’t accept anything that puts your job at risk or makes you suffer later.  Also, make a point to take on extra work when you can (periodically volunteer for extra work when you can handle it) so that your boss knows you are a team-player.

Undoubtedly, learning to say “no” is a must have skill for everyone.  Saying “no” at the right time can help you to gain respect with your peers and help avoid bitterness from those to have to hear it.

Saying “No” when you need to is Positively Beautiful!

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• Sign Up for Beauty and Living Well Tips & Tricks
• Makeup
• Hair
• Skin Care
• Acne
• Self Esteem
• Tips for Simply Living Well
• Deals, Steals & Discounts
• Exercise Everywhere
• Relationships and Communication
• In The Kitchen
• Shopping
• Brains are Beautiful
• The Mature Woman
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Healthcare providers know that there are many reasons why we suffer from low self esteem ranging from chemical imbalance to lack of faith in ourselves, past failures, dysfunctional relationships, lack of opportunities, discipline and more. Most professionals agree, however, that the number one cause of low self esteem is due to lack of positive feedback and love given to children during their early years.  Thus, its incredibly important for all parents to be aware of Building Self Esteem in Children – especially because we often do not even realize what can aid in building self esteem and what we do that inadvertently contributes to low self esteem.

What happens all too often is that children are born before their parents have matured enough to focus more clearly on their own adulthood, family and family values, in the ongoing race to succeed and find happiness.  Both parents typically work long hours, still trying to learn good work and life ethics and morals while being out from under parental influence, plus learning about family life together and extended family members and making sense of their own past, pitfalls, challenges and self development as a whole. It’s a lot all at once for our young parents.

Often before the maturing parents realize they may be repeating similar mistakes their own parents made. For example, many parents simply do not let their children try and try again and make their own mistakes. When we see our kids struggling, no matter how simple the task, we often rush in to help. What we do not realize is that the sense of accomplishment that a child feels when they figure something out on their own, contributes to their self esteem, and most especially when it was difficult to figure out and when effort was required. Likewise, many parents do not offer sincere praise and compliments to their children, instead taking them and their efforts for granted in all too often a difficult, tough world today full of challenges.

Another critical factor is that children most often truly believe in their hearts that all adults are right, and set their own values and feedback systems by them. However, unfortunately too many of these adults raising young children are still battling their own issues with self esteem and other important factors in self development.

In short, children and adults of all ages grow internally from figuring out their own problems and especially with positive feedback and encouragement from other people demonstrating their sincere care and concern.  Start up young and encourage your spouse and children to make good, healthy, positive choices. And when they fail at something, offer them hope and encouragement to try and try again….and then let them do it on their own without stepping in and doing the task for them – no matter how simple!

Also encourage education, regardless of the level you have. Too many adults often ‘say’ they want their children to success, yet negate comments all through childhood in areas of advancing education. This does not necessarily have to be in the form of schooling, but in reading (offer plenty of reading materials around the home and show by example and read yourself), encourage workshops, online classes, ebooks and more. Activities like chess, scrabble, and crosswords are great as are encouraging hobbies, such as music and service to others such as volunteer work or a part time job.

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Article contributed by Guest Writer, Fiona MacNeil of A Better Me.

Have you ever heard yourself saying… “I always have to be nice or other people will judge me.” OR  “It really bothers me if I have disappointed someone.” OR “I’ve been doing things this way for years and people expect me to continue.”

If so, you have the disease to please!  The good news is that this disease has a cure.

These feelings are based on your beliefs about the right and wrong way to do things. The next time you find yourself feeling obligated to do things you’d rather not, ask a few questions for clarity:

1. Does my belief reflect what I believe or did it develop out of my family upbringing?
2. Does this belief promote my well being and peace of mind?
3. Looking at this objectively, what evidence is there to support my belief?
4. Is this belief always true?

The goal here is not to become someone who is rude, insensitive, and only watching out for themselves.

Instead, the goal is to balance your own needs with the people around you. Being pulled  here and there by the whims, expectations, and potential disappointments of others lets people know they DON’T have to respect you in order to get what they want.

For more great information, just like this, CLICK HERE:  A Better Me.

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Do you have low self-esteem?  There’s a definite need for increased self-esteem when a person continually worries about how they look, move, and speak. Oftentimes however, many people are not even aware of the self- criticism that goes on inside. Positively Beautiful believes that beauty comes from the inside and the outside – caring for body and your health, both physical and emotional. There is nothing more beautiful than someone who radiates confidence, understanding and compassion for themselves and the world.

Self-esteem questions:

• When you look at yourself, do your eyes tend to gravitate toward something on or about yourself you feel is a flaw?
• When you laugh, do you cover your mouth with your hand because your teeth aren’t as straight or white as you wish they were?
• Perhaps when shopping you notice a perfectly, albeit unrealistically, shaped mannequin with a tiny waist and small hips, and you think about your own weight?
• When you are talking with people, do you feel like they are smarter or “better?”

A definite truth that is often overlooked is the fact that nothing will improve your overall appearance like feeling good about yourself.

While everyone has a general idea of what self-esteem is, it is more complex than liking your appearance in a particular outfit, finding a hairstyle that is flattering or feeling like your outward appearance is nice according to others. Self esteem is about loving yourself unconditionally, understanding and embracing your own self-worth and listening and always following your heart while still being compassionate to the world.

Many – actually most, women (and men too) compare themselves in unrealistic ways to others, feeling insecure, less than attractive or less than important. Having healthy self esteem allows a person to realize that they are not in a contest with others. They go about their days without the worry of what others think and they do not beat themselves up about areas they feel they are less than optimal.  It is healthy to be honest with yourself about improvements you want to make and/or goals you set in your life for personal achievement, but it is incredibly important to realize that your value as a human being is not determined by our accomplishments but how we go about reaching our goals and what our goals mean.  To be more specific its about whether we are contributing to our own well-being, the well-being of our community and doing it with a love for ourselves that makes the various journeying, joyful.

Realize that you are valuable just as you are. When you shine from the inside out, people take notice of your confidence, and nothing is more attractive than someone who is secure with who they are. With confidence, your vibrant personality shows through, unhindered by the previous hang-ups that kept it hidden. Many believe there is a link between looking good and feeling good and that is likely true, but the real link is between feeling good and looking good.  Feeling good is where it starts.

Self-esteem is reflected in everything you do, from the way you walk, to the way you speak, to the way you care for yourself, to the way you interact with others. With healthy self-esteem, you choose to look your best, take great care of yourself and accept and even love, what you cannot change about yourself. A wonderful thing about self esteem is while accepting yourself as a beautiful individual, there is inner encouragement to make positive improvements, not because you want to feel adequate for others, but rather for yourself because you know you are worth it!

Click Here for More Articles and Information about Self Esteem.

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• Sign Up for Beauty and Living Well Tips & Tricks
• Makeup
• Hair
• Skin Care
• Acne
• Self Esteem
• Tips for Simply Living Well
• Deals, Steals & Discounts
• Exercise Everywhere
• Relationships and Communication
• In The Kitchen
• Shopping
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Disclaimer: This is not medical advice.